I am forty this year,
currently living alone in LA.

On the surface, I seem to be a decent single man.
I have a job, and there are no major financial issues,
and on weekends, I enjoy exploring good coffee shops with friends.

However, there is one recurring dilemma in my life.
The inability to make decisions.

From small things like choosing a menu
to big matters like changing jobs, dating, or buying a house...
I always end up procrastinating on decisions and letting time slip away.

It has become such a habit that,
every time I turn on Netflix, I just skim through titles and 10 minutes pass by.

This is real.

Should I watch a thriller, a documentary, or just a short episode because time is precious?
If I can't decide, it ends up with 'Should I just watch YouTube today?'

Sometimes friends say to me.
"You think too much."
That might be true.

I fear the regret that comes after making a decision more than the decision itself.
Is this choice really the right one?
Would it have been better if I had chosen a different path?
Such thoughts grip me tightly and won't let go.

Procrastinating on decisions feels comfortable at first.
But if I keep putting it off,
opportunities disappear, situations change,
and in my hands, instead of 'stability', 'emptiness' remains.

So these days, I am
thinking about 'how to make decisions easily'.
Changing my personality is hard,
but I think it might be possible to train myself.

Small and simple practices I have started:

Execute small decisions immediately!

What should I drink for coffee? Without hesitation, "Iced latte."

Should I exercise or not? Without thinking, I go out for a walk. My brain starts receiving signals that 'it's okay to decide.'

Remind myself often that there is no perfect decision!

With any choice, there are gains and losses. What matters is not the result, but how to live with that choice.

Judge based on values rather than emotions

Does it align with the direction of my life? Am I closer to the person I want to be? Emotions may waver, but values keep me grounded.

A psychologist once said this.

"The reason decisions are hard is that we don't want to take responsibility."
That statement has lingered in my mind for a long time.

Making a decision means,
I become the subject of the outcome,
and I think I kept procrastinating, reflecting, and waiting because I was afraid of that.

But now I want to change.
The opportunities I missed by procrastinating on decisions
have become the most regrettable moments in my life.

So today, I resolve again.
If I turn on Netflix, I will choose within a minute.
It's okay if it's not perfect.
What matters is the attitude after the decision.

If I trust the choices I make and create meaning within them,
someday, instead of regret, only memories of growth may remain.

That is the person I aspire to be.
Someone who does not fear decisions,
and creates their own life.