This morning, I read a funny health tip while watching the news.

To summarize, "If you force yourself to hold in anger, it can lead to mental illnesses like depression, and conversely, if you can't hold it in and let your anger out, it can lead to vascular diseases or heart problems."

As soon as I read this, I almost exclaimed, "What are we supposed to do about that?" haha.

So, if you hold it in, your mind breaks down, and if you let it out, your body breaks down.

It feels like a no-win situation, and I wonder how we're supposed to live like this.

Especially for us thirty-something office workers, we go back and forth between stress hell and relief dozens of times a day.

In my case, I've accumulated enough experience at work to play a central role in operations, which means I get pushed around from above and below, and my career concerns are at an all-time high.

Looking around, friends are getting married, taking parental leave, or living the single life, and as we each start down our own paths, strange feelings of comparison and anxiety creep in.

And when I struggle to get to work every morning, what awaits me? Is it some grand self-actualization? No. It's a boss who doesn't communicate, difficult clients, endless work emails...

Honestly, you have to endure stress to get paid, and you need that paycheck to survive; that's the harsh rule of modern society.

If you want to live without stress, you'd have to live as a hermit in the mountains, but for someone like me who wants to watch OTT shows and enjoy a nice glass of wine after work, that's impossible.

But if holding it in makes you sick and letting it out makes you sick, it's clear that our brains are making unreasonable demands on us.

The Blessing for Those Who Endure? No, 'Depression'

First, let's talk about 'enduring.' From a young age, we women have been subtly taught phrases like "You should live harmoniously," "Just endure a little longer," and "Don't be so dramatic." So, when we face unfair situations at work or someone crosses a line rudely, we often put on a business smile and swallow our feelings.

"I'll just hold it in; I don't want to ruin the atmosphere."

But where do all those swallowed feelings go? Do they just disappear? Absolutely not. Our brains remember that anger and store it up. Once it reaches a critical point, it can suddenly manifest as lethargy, burnout, and terrifying depression. It's that frustrating state where you don't even want to get out of bed in the morning, and everything in the world looks gray. Holding in anger is essentially injecting poison into your own heart.

But what if you just let it all out? "High Blood Pressure Leads to Heart Disease"

"Okay, then for the sake of my mental health, I'll just speak my mind and let my anger out!" But then, heart disease and vascular issues come back to haunt me.

In reality, when you explode with anger, you often feel tension in your neck and your heart racing, right? The moment you express stress as anger, your blood pressure skyrockets, and your blood vessels constrict, putting immense strain on your heart. It's scientifically proven why those with fiery tempers struggle with health issues. If you live your life according to your temper, you might end up with serious health problems before you even enjoy your thirties.

In this harsh modern society where you can't do either, I've decided to find my own 'middle ground.' Since I can't completely avoid stress, I'll share my three survival strategies for cleverly managing stress while soothing my brain and body.

Creating My Own Safe Space to 'Release' Anger

In the workplace or public settings, you obviously need to maintain your dignity, so you have to hold it in. Instead, I make sure not to keep that anger in for long and find a safe way to release it right after work. My top recommendation is a 'private notepad.' I type out all the frustrations and emotions I felt that day without any filtering on my smartphone's notes. And once I'm done, I delete it without any regrets. Interestingly, after pouring out my anger with my fingers, my brain feels lighter, as if it's saying, 'Ah, I've let it out enough.'

Redirecting Energy Through Intense Exercise

When feelings of anger rise and my heart starts racing, I need to redirect that physical energy elsewhere to protect my blood vessels. I go swimming or run at a fast pace after work. Once I run until I can barely breathe, all the stressful memories disappear, leaving only a sense of refreshment. It's a way to forcibly release stress hormones through sweat.

The Mental Victory of "It's Okay" and "Not My Problem"

This has become my life motto lately. Don't try to understand the people who stress you out. Just think, 'Oh, that person has that kind of personality; it's okay,' and move on to keep your blood vessels safe. And the company's problems are just that—company problems, not the entirety of my life. The moment I close my work documents after hours, I mentally chant, "This is no longer my problem."

We live in a world where we can't avoid stress to survive, but that doesn't mean we have to ruin our precious minds and bodies for work. Companies can replace us more easily than we think if we get sick. But my body and mind are irreplaceable; they are uniquely mine.

To everyone who felt their chest tighten from holding in anger or strained their necks from letting it out today, let's treat ourselves to some delicious food tonight or listen to our favorite music to give our brains and hearts a break.

Even in a stressful world, let's live our thirties beautifully while cleverly protecting ourselves.

Thank you for your hard work today! Please take care of your health and keep fighting!