As I hit my forties, I strangely found that I developed a new standard.

In the past, it was always "Should I try it?" but these days, it's more like "Is it really necessary?"

Especially when it comes to things I'm unsure about. I feel like I tend to lean towards not doing them rather than pushing through like I used to.

At first, I thought this was just me becoming more passive with age.

In the past, I would try to meet new people or start new things, even if it meant pushing my limits.

But now, my perspective has changed.

I think I've realized that my energy isn't limitless.

Even if a day seems long, it goes by quickly once I start using it.

After taking care of the kids, doing household chores, and keeping in touch with people, there isn't much time left.

So these days, my criteria for choices is, "Do I really need to do this?"

Or, "Will it cause a big problem in my life if I don't?" I tend to look at these questions first.

And most of the things I'm unsure about are often things I don't really need to do.

In terms of relationships, I used to try to meet people even if it was a bit uncomfortable. But now, if I feel like, "This isn't right," I don't force it anymore.

Even if they're not bad people, I've come to think that if they don't match with me, that's where it ends.

The same goes for work. If someone suggests I try something, I used to think about it for a long time, but now I just take a quick look.

I ask myself if it's something I really want to do, or if I'm just swayed because others are doing it. If it's the latter, I almost never do it.

And to be honest, I think my way of handling failure has changed too.

In my twenties and early thirties, I could brush off failures as "experience." I felt I had plenty of time to start over.

But once you hit forty, it doesn't feel so light anymore. Time, energy, and mindset aren't the same as they used to be.

So I think I'm becoming more cautious. It's not just about challenging myself; knowing what not to do seems to be more important now.

Of course, that doesn't mean I'm doing nothing. In fact, it's the opposite.

What I truly want to do becomes clearer. I let go of the vague things and focus on what's certain. It feels like my options have decreased, but the intensity has increased. I guess you could say the way I spend my time has become clearer.

Ultimately, my current standard is this: "If I'm unsure about it, I won't do it." This surprisingly helps me sort out a lot. It reduces my time spent worrying and my regrets. Instead, when I feel like, "This is something I need to do," I act on it right away.

I don't think getting older means fewer opportunities. Rather, I see it as a time to reduce unnecessary choices. It's not about gaining more, but about protecting what I already have and making it stronger.

So these days, when I find myself in doubt, I think, "Will it be a big deal if I don't do this?"

Or I just laugh it off. It's much easier that way.